Terror Couture

Recently, I’ve become obsessed by terrorist chic- not the kind defined so brilliantly by bradtriescriticaltheory – the sort that’s already been coopted and comodified to the point that Palestinians should be embarassed to wear the kaffieyeh, but things you could only hope to buy abroad or in the untouched pockets of outer borogh New York. After all, isn’t that what drives fashion? Having stuff others can’t? Terror chic are things I would wear if i lived in nihilist, party-obsessed Berlin, where no one gives a fuck about being PC and my friend Anna walks around in a fox stole and suspenders over a wifebeater. Granted, I’ve never been there, but if i were i think this is what i would don.

La Santa Muerte medal:

Two years from now, this will be on Vice Mag’s DOs/DON’Ts list. Today, I could only begin to start to tell you where you get it. Santa Muerte is the sculled and hooded figure of death, the patroness of narcotraficantes. Wear it on a gold chain, either over your cleavage creasing text-tat or in that bear-patch you’ve so artfully groomed to  sweat in full public view  over the collar of your V-neck 50-50 tee.

Tamil Tiger stripe-y camo:

Female Tigers in the rebels signature Tigerstripe pattern

Female Tigers in the rebels signature Tigerstripe pattern

Imagine the possibilities! This pattern, known in fashion and military circles as “Tigerstripe” was designed for close range jungle combat and popularized by the Vietnam War, the grandfather of every significant theme in protest fashion, from Che t-shirts to handkerchiefs and really really big scarves. Long before America standardized the 64-stripe pattern, tigerstripe had been the pattern of choice with the French–those military fashion mavens–in the jungles of South East Asia.

Why, then, do you want the Tamil Tigerstripe? BECAUSE IT’S UNLIKE ANY OTHER TIGERSTRIPE IN THE WORLD!!! This is post-colonial patterning at its best, madam and mademoiselle.  And just look how they wear it–if there’s one thing the Tigers did better than any other paramilitary outfit in the world, it was womenswear. Why not immortalize 25 years of bloody civil war and the death of 20,000 civilians this year alone with an absolutely unique, statement screaming pattern?

Thakery’s Shiv Sena Shades

Tired of wearing Rx-less glasses with no deeper meaning? Why not trade in your Vintage Buddy Holly specs for a pair of Bal Thakery’s? Thakery is the founder and chief of the brutal Shiv Sena Hindu nationalist party in Mahrashtra, where Mumbai is located. His glasses–huge, squarish black rimmed affairs of exactly the type recently made popular by American Apparel et al–come in both tinted and clear, and have overseen the violent murder of thousands, the resturcturing of one of the world’s most populous cities along ethnic lines, and general communal mayhem.  They also make you (and him) look  vaguely intellectual. Think Mickey Rooney in Breakfast at Tiffany’s, to the power of Tamil musicals.

total fashion coup. to be continued…

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